~GRELL'S SURPRISINGLY NORMAL DIARY~</u>
December 25th 1880</u>
Today I finally got myself a brand new diary~ I'm so happy that I'll have somewhere to write my thoughts down once again for the first time since my old one ran out... I kept wanting to buy a new one and Ronald was like 'Oh don't worry man, I need to think of SOMETHING to get you for Christmas' so I waited and waited and waited and you know what? He didn't even get me one. He got em a pair of lousy red socks just like he does every year.
And William? What did he get me? Why some files of course. For my paperwork. And a pen. At least he took the time to get my name engraved on the pen though... I'm writing with it right now... I ended up having to go out into the freezing snow, find an open shop and buy my own diary...
So anyway, it's been a pretty lame Christmas actually. Eric and Alan each got me a romance novel, which I actually hate even though I pretend to like them (they're all the same and SO boring), Undertaker gave me some weird guide on 'how to get a man' (which I have now used as kindling for my fire) and while everyone else was out having fun even William to my surprise I've been sitting alone in my cold room staring at my pitiful gifts and wondering just what the hell I am doing with my life.
No-one seems to understand that I'm just a normal guy! They all seem to avoid me and treat me differently but if they talked to em properly, then maybe they might see that my behaviour is just a charade for my true personality. I'm not really a flamboyant-wannabe-woman, in fact I'm very happy with being a guy. I just need to find the right girl, but since they all think I'm gay, it getting increasingly harder... I mean, it just started off as a joke at first, acting all weird and stuff and it made people actually pay attention to me instead of just ignoring me all the time. Unfortunately, this turned to negative attention and soon I was EXPECTED to act weird... IT can be so stressful at times and that's why I really needed this diary... *Sigh*
Well it's getting late anyway... I guess I should just stop writing and go cry myself to sleep... Haha... not really, I'm not THAT depressed... But I will lie there staring at the ceiling for a while though.
December 26th 1880</u>
Don't you just hate that feeling you get the day after Christmas? Well I've been miserable all day, especially after Ronald took me out to a bar and tried to hook me up with some really ugly fat guys before laughing his head off (he was so drunk) and leaving me stranded while he went off arm in arm with some pretty bombshell. I finally managed to track him down a couple of hours later lying in the snow passed out. Have you any idea how heavy that idiot is? EXTREMELY. And I had to carry him all the way back to his house.
Well anyway, I finally managed to get home, completely freezing to death and decided to have a nice hot bath but guess what? My hot water generator broke. And I didn't realise this until I jumped into a freezing cold bath and nearly had a heart attack from the shock. I think I have a cold now... And I'll need to get someone round to fix the problem, but if course, they won't come during the holidays will they? Stupid people...
December 27th 1880</u>
So ill that I couldn't really get out of bed today... For some strange reason William called round with a pie that he made and gave me some tea. I found it oddly nice of him until he told me that he wanted me to get better quickly so I wouldn't miss any work... He also said it was to make up for me bringing Ronald back, because if I hadn't, HE would have missed work too. Sometimes I think William is too work-driven...
December 28th 1880</u>
Still too ill to do much today so I tried reading one of the crappy books Eric and Alan had got me. It was some lame story about a woman who was having an affair before realising that her husband was the one she truly loved and blah, blah ,blah. It just made me feel worse about my lack of female friend so I chucked it away and slept for most of the rest of the day.
December 29th 1880</u>
Feeling a bit better today, so I called to see if anyone could help me with my hot water problem. Of course, they said that no-one could come until after the holidays so I ended up going round Ronald's house (sometimes I'm glad he doesn't live that far from me) to have a much needed hot bath. Shame Ronald had to ruin it by hiding my clothes before running out of the house though... I just don't get why he pranks me so much... It's annoying!
After I finally found my clothes (by which time I was freezing again) Ronald finally came back acting all innocent and saying that he'd just gone out to 'buy me some medicine'. He didn't have any with him though. Mind you, he did give me a lift home so guess it's not all bad...
December 30th 1880</u>
Seriously dreading the New Year's party tomorrow... I always seem to end up ridiculed by everyone and wake up with a headache painful enough to make me weep. Even William goes crazy at these parties... He tries to remain all calm and cool but once he gets some alcohol down him he loses it almost instantly. Last year he forced everyone to swap clothes and act like each other... It was all very awkward (and rather depressing when I saw how people really saw me... You should have seen how they acted like 'me'...) I'm tempted to just skip it altogether this year...
Anyway, as for today... Well it was average. No-one called, no-one visited, I spent a lot of time catching up on paperwork and staring out of the window at the heavy snow that started today for no reason. It's still pretty early as I write this but I might just go to sleep... I have to prepare for tomorrow...
December 31st 1880</u>
...I don't want to talk about it.